I Have a Couch!

So, I've had this couch for a while now. I bought it when I got my apartment after I finished college. It's kinda a weird color somewhere in between dark gray and brown, and I'm pretty sure it's made out of carpet material. On one side it's shredded, like maybe a dog used to love the same couch. Did I mention it came from Goodwill?

My apartment has some other quirky decorations. Right above that couch is a beautiful clock, and it doesn't really match the couch. All around the ceiling is green Christmas garland left over from my wedding decorations. I count seven different shades of wood on as many other pieces of furniture (more than half of those pieces are bookcases - some six feet tall, one is only about three and a half feet). My kitchen is in the shared laundry room across the hall - ok, it's not a kitchen, but I leave my toaster oven and crockpot there.

I'm not telling you this because I want you to feel sorry for me. As I'm sitting on my queen sized bed (with a king sized blanket) I'm smiling. I love my home!

Why? Because this is the home God provided for me and Stephen. Most of our furniture was given to us, and looking at my wedding decorations always makes me think about my wonderful wedding and the people God has put in my life that made my wedding possible.

With all of that, there's a lot around me to make me feel inadequate. My favorite place to go hang out while Stephen and I were dating was IKEA. Everything there is beautiful, new, and matching. Nothing has been pre-loved.

Then I look at Facebook. I see cooking videos I cannot make with what I have right now (although I have tried some of them). I see lots of women my age, or younger, having babies. It makes me feel like something is wrong with me because I "waited" so long to get married. Then I look around my home again, and realize there is no room for a crib, so we're all good for now. 😉

Everywhere around me, I can see life from two different perspectives. The one that makes me feel like I am loved by God and the people around me. And the perspective that tells me I don't know how to love myself enough.

Does that seem like a leap to you? I'm not saying that having matching furniture or babies is a bad thing (trust me, I LOVE the cute pictures). But why? Changing my status in life is only a good thing when it is to continue to fulfill God's call on my life in His timing. If the changes are brought about to fulfill my own desires, or to make my life look better or more Facebook worthy, or to bring me more in step with my peers, these are not coming from God! This is wrong! Don't believe me? Look at 1 John 2:16.

Ladies, you don't have to have mismatched furniture or live in a hobbit hole to be spiritual. But you also don't have to follow a diet, have a birthing plan, or decorate your home based on a Pinterest color palette. Love God first, love others next, and smile at your perfect little home and life. It'll probably change when you're not looking.

Because of Him,

Missa

My husband and I in our beat up '95 Buick leaving on our honeymoon :)

Leaving My Love for Less

"Why" is my favorite question. The answer to it always tells so much about a person, if they answer it honestly and completely (although if they don't answer honestly, that also explains a lot). I routinely ask myself this question about various life issues.

For example, I am switching jobs next month. Why am I doing that? I have a couple of reasons. My old job was very stressful (I've heard my new job is too.....). I had a forever long commute - like, an hour. Each way. That plus a 1 hour lunch made my days 11 hours long - and I still had to find time to live, love, and serve. That's a pretty good reason. I'm not switching for the pay. Working for a lawyer vs. working for a pastor, enh, God will provide. I stopped trying to do the math in my finances a while ago. Some more reasons: saving on gas, free lunch, and a flexible schedule.

Those are all perks, and not bad things. But at the root of my decision to switch jobs, was simply because now my husband and I will be working at the same place (not in the same office, though. That could get awkward - for everyone else). And coming in a very close second is the opportunity to work full time for my church. Those are my reasons.

The reason I ask so many questions of others and myself is because I love to set goals. And I love to achieve them. I've wondered a few times if this is for my own personal glory and satisfaction, but most of the times the why answer is not inherently selfish. I set daily goals at work, and I feel good about reaching them, but in reality I set them so that I produce at the level expected of me at work. 

So, goals and why stopped my brain in the middle of my Sunday evening class (sorry, Pastor Todd). Lately, I've been struggling like nobody's business to be in my Bible (see above mentioned long work day). I've been convicted about it, and I try to set goals and work and plan and schedule - and I'm still failing. 

I've always been a failure to a certain degree in this area. But I've never really asked myself why. So here goes. 

I want to study my Bible, memorize, and pray more because I studied ministry and that's what ministry people do. Because I know I should. Because I have people who ask me ministry/Bible questions, and I love people/counseling. Because I want to write more on this blog. Because I'm serving as a full time ministry person this summer. Because I feel like a failure. 

So, last week this is again on my heart as I'm in the morning service, and I begin to write down my plan. Every week, I will:

1. Translate 1 Chapter from the Greek

2. Memorize 1 Chapter

3. Write 1 Devotional Blog Post

4. Pray through every prayer card 1x

5. Do a Bio of God on 1 Chapter

Plus, I made a calendar of which books of the Bible I'm studying! Yay Goals! 

FAIL!

Yeah, I read through Galatians 2 or 3 times this week, and I found my Greek New Testament (took me like 2 whole minutes because it was on the bookcase where it belonged). And here I am working on the blog post! I actually wasn't planning on writing this until this evening, which was long after I had forgotten all of my goals. 

Because I have forgotten why. 

No, all the reasons above are still there, but I need to put them back in the perks category.

~Galatians 1:6~

I marvel that you are turning away so soon from Him who called you in the grace of Christ, to a different gospel,

I have lost focus on the one Who called me to Himself, and have created a different ideal of what a perfect life is, a different gospel or good news. 

A couple of things, this passage is addressed to Christians who are listening to teachers who insist on legalism as a requirement for salvation. Though I would not say that I have added to or taken away from the Gospel, I have distorted my view on what the Christian life is about. And Salvation is not a moment, though it happens in a moment, but a continuing status. 

And this happens quickly, like Paul says! One minute I am completely in love with Christ and His Word, and the next I'm making rules and disciplining myself to reach my goals. I've been told that when we don't feel like doing our devotions, we should do them anyway because we won't always want to love our spouse, but we have to anyway.

I have always thought that was a good reason! Now I'm reconsidering. If you don't want to do your devotions, maybe you should find out why. (There's that question again) Maybe you have been intentionally sinning. That'll kill your love for Christ quickly. Maybe, you're being selfish in your life, and would rather serve you than spend time with the lover of your soul. That would be a problem. Maybe you have allowed the cares of the day to burden you until you are exhausted and need more sleep. Yes, I said need. Cast your care on Him! Take His light burden. Life happens, and you may not have 45 minutes a day everyday - but it's not about the long chunks of time (even though you MUST get those) but about the moment-by-moment heart connection with God. 

Play-acting love is not healthy in a relationship, and it is not healthy in our spiritual life. Don't force it, unless you want to force it for the rest of your life. 

My life is not to be lived by a checklist or obligation, but rather by the answer to this question:

Why?

Because of Him.

Millenials, The Harvest Is For You

I'm in an interesting point in my life. College is done, I just got married, and I'm pretty sure I'm not quite in my career yet. Last year, I had just moved back from college, I was dating and pretty sure I was going to marry Stephen, but anything could happen. I got a good enough job to pay my rent in my own apartment. But I didn't know what was happening next. But I had God. He was taking care of me, providing for me, and He knew what was going to happen next. Sometimes adulting is scary, but I never had to worry because I had the God of the future doing my meal planning.

But my friends, my peers, what would it be like if you don't know God? Even if you have a bad relationship with God, you can always turn to Him. But there is a world that is lost who cannot turn to Him. They are lost! They don't know where to turn! 

I have a friend who is in this position. She isn't saved. She has no family out here. She is paying her rent on her own, and working 2 jobs to do it. I don't think she has a boyfriend, but she wants to get married someday. 

But she is lost. She has no hope in her life besides just making in through the week.

Millennials want transparency. They want to know the truth, whether they like it or not (they will also, in the spirit of transparency, tell you that they don't like it). Our parents grew up in a secular world of relativism, and a spiritual world of regulation. But our world cannot be like that. I have yet to meet a millennial who outright rejected me for my beliefs, but I have often met ones who were willing to listen and disagree with me. 

Stop thinking about yourself and being afraid of rejection. Use the culture for your advantage. But not for your advantage, for the goal of working as a field hand in the Master's harvest. 

We've been told as a generation that we can do whatever we want, which must mean being president or an astronaut or a lawyer. There is nothing wrong with any of those jobs, but if we can be what ever we want, why not choose to be a Spurgeon? Why not a Jim Elliot? Why not an Amy Charmichal? All that is required to serve is a submissive love for our good God. 

Millennials, our parents and grandparents look at us and do not understand how to reach us through our world of technology. But we do. We can reach our peers. We understand the hipster coffee scene. We understand the minimalist lifestyle. We understand the importance of accumulating experience as opposed to accumulating stuff. 

But we have to push to get out of our group. That is hard. We as Christians have to invest time with one person at a time. Millennials like groups. Introverts have Facebook groups and extroverts have Friday night groups. And we are all very good at group communication. We can send out a tweet, or post on Instagram. But the pretty Bible verse or awesome ambiguous quote is not going to change anyone's mind. It's the conversation you have, one on one. 

~Matthew 9:36-38~

Seeing the people, He felt compassion for them, because they were distressed and dispirited like sheep without a shepherd. Then He said to His disciples, “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Therefore beseech the Lord of the harvest to send out workers into His harvest.”

Our lifestyle has become one of the most meaningless forms of existence in history. We have traded relationships for Facebook friends. Our generation has been taught that anything is acceptable and what is not acceptable should be thrown away. When all truth has been erased and morals are reduced to what we feel, there are no answers for the evil in this world that we have suddenly arrived in as adults. 

I would like to add that as of right now, this story does not have a happy ending. My friend has been to my church's property, but has yet to attend a service. I have also not yet been able to have more than a few brief conversations, but I am confident that God is pursuing her. 

Because of Him,
Missa

Change, Not Work

A Christian is not someone who does Christian things, a Christian is someone who is changed.

It's so hard to explain a Christian to someone who is not. There seem to be so many rules, but we teach grace. There is so much to do, but we teach that God has done everything. There is so much for us to change, but everyday we fail, and we all know Christians who do not act like Christians.

What in the world???

How can anyone do everything right the whole time???

How can anyone be a Christian, when so much is required?

What if nothing is required to be a Christian?

I love being married. I love having a husband, someone I know is there every night, no matter what. A lot changed, though, when I got married. My schedule changed. I now live somewhere else, so my commute to work is different. When I get off work, I can't just stop on my way home if I want to, because his class schedule is such that if we want to see each other, I have to come right back. I used to work out almost every night, and call him while I was at the gym. Now, he prefers me to either be with him or to go to the gym together. It used to not matter what or if I ate dinner (or any other meal). If I was meeting with a friend for the evening, I could eat at midnight or not at all.

But why did I change? Not because I'm required to, but because I'm requested to. Or even not requested to, but because I'm so in love with my husband, that I want to do what would make him happiest. I'm his wife because I vowed to be, not because of what I do.

Another thing I would like to add, everyone's relationship with their spouse looks a little different. Not everyone has their spouse taking night classes. Maybe both or neither are. Maybe you're not working, but your husband is. That's OK. What's important is that you love your spouse the way that is best for them.

You should spend time with God every day! Read your Bible! Pray! Why? Because it's what all Christians do? No! Because this God who loves you and died for you wrote down all this information about Who He is! Listen to Him! Talk to Him! Just like I would tell a wife to spend time with her husband, it's not legalism or required performance, it just makes sense.

Now let's think about this in relation to our relationship with God. When you get saved, you should change. Your schedule should change. What you do should change. How you live should change. Not because God requires it, but because He loves you and you love Him.

You should also be going to church regularly. You should be involved in your church too. Why? Because in Hebrews we are told to not forsake assembling together with other believers because it helps us to encourage each other to love and serve others.

So... What if what we do is because we were changed and we want to love God, because He first loved us and gave Himself for us. We will not do what Christians do, we will be what Christians are.

Changed.

Because of Him,

Missa

Thoughts on Love from a Marriage Expert

Yes, I am a marriage expert. I have been married for 12 whole days now (give or take a few hours).

No, I don't expect anyone to take me seriously.

2.5 years ago, my darling first told me he liked me. 9 months later, he told me he loved me. And some days I feel like that is all I know about him.

But that's all I need to know.

Oh, I can give you details about his favorite food, hobbies, and what he's studying in college - but you could probably get that out of him too. That's the kind of stuff you find out in a getting to know you conversation.

Maybe the next time you talk, you would ask his dreams and aspirations. He's got them.

But I am his wife. I know he loves me. And he doesn't love you the same way.

I'm very skittish about relationships (I've been burned a few times), and I don't believe people when they tell me they like me. Much less love me. You can say that, but I will immediately build a wall to keep from getting hurt again. And it's not that I like you any less or care about you any less, but I still won't trust you. That's my problem. Not yours. And frankly, I don't expect you to make me trust you. Like I said, my problem.

But for the past 2.5 years, my darling has been proving to me how much he liked me. And how much he loved me. When we first started dating, he couldn't wait to hear from me.We were on other sides of the country writing emails at least every day, if not more. Phone calls often didn't work out because of logistics and timing. I remember being a little uncomfortable with this. He actually wanted to know what I was doing every day. He cared about my classes, my friends, whether I was getting enough sleep. He and I discussed philosophy and our relationship with God.

I already liked him, but now I was falling in love with him. He was wonderful, Godly, sweet, and he cared about me.

But I didn't believe him when after 9 months of 1000+ word emails daily, he told me he loved me. It wasn't my picture perfect moment (but I've come to realize that those really only come in Disney movies). We were Skyping, and I actually didn't understand him when he said it, so I had to ask him to repeat himself, just because that was the last thing I was expecting him to say.

Even though I knew that I loved him, there was a part of me that didn't completely believe what he was saying.

Now, we are 22 months later, and I believe him. The poor guy went through a lot trying to convince me. He repeated himself, wrote letters to me, and just stayed  me. When a lesser man would have gotten frustrated because I was still pushing back, he kept pulling me in.

I considered breaking up with him so many times, but I never once heard that he ever seriously thought about it. He loves me. He wanted me to be the woman who is by his side every single day.

He listened when my day was hard, bought me chocolate to make me fat (jk, but some days are just perfect for a bite or 2 of dark chocolate), and never backed away until he knew that I knew he loved me.

And then he proposed.

But I learned something about him yesterday. He is a very busy man.

We were in between family events and it was a long day after a very long night, when his phone rang. It was something else for him to take care of. Another problem for him to fix.

I knew he was tired, and I was frustrated at the people who were making him tired.

But this is the man I married. A man who will sacrificially serve others. A man who is always busy, but doesn't look like it.

Now, I really know what it took, all those times I just needed to hear his voice say "I love you". All of the times I asked him to go out of his way to spend time with me. All of dating and the long process to marry me.

Now all I know of my husband, is that he loves me.

This reminds me of Christ, our heavenly bridegroom (see Ephesian 5:25) who loved us sacrificially. He died, and gave himself for us, shouting to all ages His love for us. And here we are 2,000 years later, still pushing back. Doubting Him, demanding He cater to our needs, and pushing back on spending time with Him because we don't understand His love. We have pages upon pages of His letter to us.

How have we made it this long without seeing Him for Who He truly is? The One Person Who above and beyond all earthly companions has proved His love for us? Romans 5:8 tells how the love of Christ compelled Him to die for us while we were still sinners and rejecting Him. (See also John 3:16). He died for all, and He specifically loves you.

Seeing this and allowing it to permeate our lives are completely different things. Just like I could hear the words "I love you", and not allow it to affect me. I needed to trust Stephen that his love for me was real. And live my life like it was. I had to say yes to his proposal.

How does Christ's love change our lives? It should change us into His image. We should become like Him.

We should love Him. And respect Him. And give our lives, pledging ourselves only unto Him, till death do us unite.

Because of Him,

Missa

Walk by Faith

I wasn't planning on a theme, but faith comes up once again in my personal devotions and thoughts. In 2 Corinthians 5:7 we have at least one iteration of the phrase "we walk by faith and not by sight." Our eternal existence is based entirely on faith that what we read in a Book written 2000 years ago is true. The way we act displays (or it should) our eternal destination. To put it another way, if this life isn't all there is, then Christians use their time on earth in a different way than unbelievers.

So, assuming the above is true, and everyone reading this is a Christian.... why don't we act like it? No, I am not talking about manners or mannerisms. I am talking about living a life that acts like the God in the Bible is real. He has given so many promises! Matthew 6 talks about how He knows you need food and clothing, and He will take care of you! Deuteronomy 31 says that God will never leave us. This is in the context of fighting a battle! If God is on your side in any battle, you know the outcome. The same concept of His presence is also in Hebrews 13:5. This promise is to reassure us as His children, and to turn our eyes away from lusting and coveting.

Earlier in Hebrews, God gives us a list of people who lived by faith. They acted out and spoke about what they knew to be true about God. And what they did was pretty crazy. Noah built an ark for 100 years, and no one outside his family believed him enough to even get on the boat just in case. Abraham left the protection of his family clan to travel to a place that he didn't know. And God didn't tell him where he was going, He just told him to walk. Imagine trying to explain that to your relatives.

But God knew what He was doing. He had a plan that was bigger than what made sense. He wanted to redeem all of mankind.

I'm not saying that we shouldn't plan for the future (you can look at Proverbs if you want verses on that), but I would like to say that maybe it's not our future to plan. You can go to school and learn a lot, and end up working for McDonalds the rest of your life because you can't find another job. You can work hard and move up to the top of the corporate ladder, if you want to.

Maybe instead of looking at what makes the most sense financially, it's time to look at what God wants you to do. Work hard, but only as unto God (Colossians 3:22 ff). Decide how to spend your time and resources by faith. Yeah, I mean that we should be praying about everything. And we need to follow Him on whatever path He directs us whenever He directs us.

I've heard some stories about people who were called to be missionaries, and then they never made it for one reason or another, and disaster struck their family. I know that God does chasten His children to get us to where we need to be, but I don't think that happens in every situation. I think we can decide to not follow God's leading, but we will miss out on a reward that is eternal in heaven. Maybe that means that our 401k is not as big as our financial adviser would like it to be. Maybe we don't ever get to have a new car or a big home. This world is not all there is.

Has God asked you to walk?

Because of Him,
Missa

Pray in Faith

Maybe you've seen the movie War Room, maybe every message you've heard lately has reminded you to pray, maybe the state of the country has you turning to God with more questions than He seems to be answering right now. I don't know. For me, though, I have been reminded to pray nearly every day for the past six weeks. Would you believe I still forget all the time?

The reason I forget is because I have requests on my list that are still unanswered. Requests I have been praying about for 4-5 years. I know I'm young, and that might not seem like a lot of time to some of the women who read this, but some of these requests deal with situations that affect me all day every day.

The reason I forget is because I can always find something else that needs to be done now, and I'll make sure to have my quiet time later. I need to make dinner so that it will be ready when my roommate gets back. I need to do laundry because I've been putting it off for too long. I need to spend time with my boyfriend since we've been long distance for a year and a half, and now we are finally living in the same state again.

The reason I forget is because my schedule has been too crazy since I finished school, moved across the country, and started a new job. I haven't even been able to figure out a way to make sure I text everyone I want to stay in touch with on a regular basis.

The reason I forget is because I forget how weak I am. My life doesn't work without God.

I have seen God answer prayer before. Once, when I was 13 or 14, I wanted to go to camp so badly. My parents had sent us when we were in 6th grade to Jr camp and that was all that we could expect. We didn't spend a lot of time away from home without them. I remember asking God to please let me go to camp and provide the money somehow. I had enough to pay for half, and the babysitting business had been slow. I never told my parents about that prayer. I never told anyone. The night before we had to sign up for camp, my mom told me, out of the blue, that they would be willing to pay for half, if I wanted to go to camp that year. That's what God does for a kid!

Three and a half years ago, I wanted to go to college, and I had been asking God for some way to be able to go. He provided a job that allowed me to be able to go.

Last year, I was struggling to get enough to pay my school bill by just working on campus, so I applied for a job off campus. After three tries to get to the interview (we had some beautiful snow days!) I was offered the position at twice what I had been making at BJU. But I didn't have a car, and I knew my friends couldn't drive me to work all the time. I had $1000 and 2 days. God provided a car off of craigslist that actually ran, had low mileage, and still has not needed a major repair.

This past month, I had a roommate set up, but I didn't have a job. God provided a job within 36 hours of arriving in town. With enough to pay my bills and have left overs for fun extra stuff too. And they'll pay for me to get my master's degree. Still thinking about that one ;)

Why don't I pray? Because I forget. God not only provides for me as His beloved child, but He always listens to me. He is the reason I have life! He is the reason I have a purpose. I'm not saying that everything I've ever wanted I got... But everything I have ever needed, I have.

Yes, I sometimes wonder how God will answer those old requests of mine, but I pray in faith knowing that His timing is best, His plan is perfect, and He loves me more than anyone else possibly could.

Because of Him,
Missa

Content to not know

I've spent a lot of time lately hearing about contentment. And a lot about change. I am graduating in 6 days from BJU. I feel like Rapunzel in Tangled:

Rapunzel: I've been looking out of a window for eighteen years, dreaming about what I might feel like when those lights rise in the sky. What if it's not everything I dreamed it would be? 
Flynn Rider: It will be. 
Rapunzel: And what if it is? What do I do then? 
Flynn Rider: Well,that's the good part I guess. You get to go find a new dream. 

Yeah, going to college was my dream. I waited 3.5 years after highschool to go, and the whole time I never knew if I was going to be able to finish it. Most of those closest to me didn't expect me to go, they certainly never expected me to finish. And I'm the first to admit that I doubted often whether or not it was God's will for me to be here. 

But now, I know that it is not His will for me to be here anymore - for now at least. 

Back to my original point, God has being teaching me about being content in change. There are a lot things about my life that are unknowns. How will I afford my apartment, when I don't have a job yet? How will my relationships with others change? I don't want to be the person who gets a degree and then wastes it by never putting it to use. 

As much as I want the security of knowing what is going to happen next, I know one thing for sure. I am secure in the will of God. And He has not shown me the future yet. I've been asked a couple of times 'what's next?' and I don't have an answer. I have a boyfriend, but I'm not engaged like a lot of the other girls graduating, so I'm not planning a wedding. Too many things are moving around for me to know any where close to where I'm planning to be in 5 years. 

So, what do I know? 

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

My head screams that that is not an answer! But it's what my God has chosen to reveal to me. He has shown me what He requires of me: to serve Him with all of my heart in the moment He calls me to live.

When I look back at what He has taught me, He has always provided perfectly for my needs. He has continued to grow me, and turn my heart ever more towards Him (though I often forget the lessons I've learned and need a refresher). He has placed people in my life that have had a huge impact on me. And He allowed me to be used by Him in other's lives. I don't need to be afraid of wasting my degree, because I know that the One Who gave it to me has the prerogative to chose what happens. I know that He has changed me forever because of my time here.

Guess it's time to find a new dream. In the meantime, I'm content with the change.

Because of Him,
Missa

Just a Puff

Sometimes, life just gets the best of you. If college is supposed to be the best time of my life, then I'm headed for destruction pretty fast.... I run to work, run to class, think about eating and go on a coffee run instead, run (or pretend to at least) to stay fit, and run to Christ every day during chapel.

Summer! Freedom! Lets add in 40+ hours of work, 8 credits of online classes, and training horses on the side (that only lasted as long as I didn't have to write papers for the online class). At least in summer I have enough time to enjoy my coffee while working on homework.

Next week, I will be starting my senior semester at BJU. I'm the weird person who transferred in January and will graduate in December. I can't believe it's here already. All my friends are here - friends who I would classify as more than family. I have a dear church who has continually shown the love and graciousness of Christ (we regularly practice the Baptist sacrament of consuming food).

Since my first week at BJU, I was required for a class to take notes on 50 sermons (which wasn't hard since we have chapel 4 days a week and 2 services on Sunday), so I would write next to the date in my notebook what number each sermon was. I decided to continue this practice even after I had completed the assignment. Tonight, I took notes for sermon #478. In the past 32 months, I have taken notes on all of those sermons (some, I forgot to bring my notebook, so the actual number is a lot higher). I have learned that my God walks on the storms of life, been encouraged to run the race and walk in the Spirit. I know that my life only makes sense when explained by faith and that God desires a life broken and spilled out for Him.

And while I'm huffing and puffing through my college days, I'm reminded that life is just a puff.

Tonight, life has slowed down - a calm before the storm of classes and homework. I drove home tonight after church and all around me I saw clouds. Big puffy storm clouds that just haven't released their burdens on the world. One of the clouds, at just the right angle, looked just like the Sphinx. Yeah, I still imagine pictures in the clouds - don't judge. 15 minutes later, I couldn't really see the cloud from my angle, and it probably changed anyway.

But think about the real Sphinx for a moment. What is it really, but a tribute to another human's puff of a life. Yeah, we have the real limestone statue, but who built it again? According to the all-knowing Google, the best guess is Pharaoh Khafra, but that is only a guess. They don't know for sure. Whoever it was, their life is gone.

One thing I know, however short or long my life may be, it's not likely to linger much longer than that cloud did tonight. Someday, all the burdens will be dropped, all the running will stop. Will I make a greater impact on this world than a pharaoh did with stone?

We have one chance to make this puff worth something. All of those sermons, all of my classes, all of the time spent studying the God of the universe will make a difference. Only He can change the world in a puff. We can simply choose to be part of His plan.

Because of Him,
Missa

It's 7:15 am and my coffee is already cold

Good morning! Doesn't that sound like a cheery message? But that really is how my life is going right now.

This past week I have been fairly sick... worse than I've been for a really long time. Basically for the last four days I've slept and emerged only enough to get food and go to chapel and required work meetings. My poor chapel buddies must think I have the plague. I've skipped classes and church. Today, I decided that I could not afford to be sick any longer. But that means that I had to get up with enough time to go to breakfast and make it to the student center by 7:15 to open. Luckily, my body decided that 4 am would be a great time to decide that I didn't need to breath, so I woke up to keep myself alive, and kinda just dozed for another two hours.

Why am I telling you this? Do I really just want sympathy or a hot cup of coffee? Not really.

Have you ever thought about how dependent on God we are? Sure, we've all heard the cliches that we're not guaranteed another breath, but does that really sink in? How about that God allowed you to wake up this morning? Our bodies are moving, breathing, functioning by the sustaining power of God.

This morning, I was nearly in tears trying to get going and unlocking all of the doors in the student center... I couldn't find sugar in the dining common, so I knew that my coffee was going to taste weird at best, why did I bother to toast my bagel when I knew that it would for sure be cold before I was done with all of my opening duties? Why did I have to be the one who was working insanely early hours after a late night?

Grumble, mumble, murmer.

Ladies and gentlemen, this morning, God gave me grace enough to wake up in time to make it to the dining common and get breakfast before I had to work. Last night, my roommate bought me creamer so that I could enjoy my coffee... cold or not. This morning, God gave me a quiet place to study Greek for the test I have this afternoon. Last night, I fell asleep and slept in a longer block than I have for four days. This morning, God allowed me to use the strength He gave me to work a job so that I can pay my school bill. Last night, one of my co-workers had an umbrella, so I didn't have to walk back from the meeting in the rain.

It's 8:45 am, my coffee is almost gone, and my God is still good beyond what I need. He doesn't have to sustain me, but He does. He doesn't have to send people into my life to just do nice things, but He does. He doesn't have to let me have coffee, but He does.

Because of Him,
Missa

Like a Child

Thinking about my camp experience, some stories make me smile more than others. Like when I was eating dinner one night and one of the other girl counselors came up and gave me a hug. My little 8 year old camper asked who that was and then said "wow! She's prettier than you are!"

The same week, I was having a friendly duel with patience. Up to that point of the summer, I had had 15 year olds who at least know the basics of cleaning...Not so with 8 year olds. One of the girls excitedly volunteered the first day to clean the toilet, and obviously I agreed. It is rare to find such passion in one so young....

The whole week, my cabin regularly failed cabin check. It. Was. Bad. I tried getting them up 20 minutes earlier, I showed them how to clean, I cleaned with them without actually doing all of the work for them...

Everyday, though, the girls left the cabin sure that they would win because of how beautiful it was. Saturday morning, I packed all of my little ducks (which is what I had called them all week) and sent them out the door onto their lovely bus. Then I began to really clean. The cabin wasn't destroyed, but it sure did need some work to get it up to passing for my cabin check the next day.

Think about us, as Christians, as 8 year olds serving God. We can try so hard, and we do the best that we can serving God, but our best work is so pathetic, its laughable. We can push ourselves harder and set aside more time to serve Him, go door knocking every Saturday, but ultimately, its no better. You can study up for serving God. I was reading a Jerry Bridges book and got the inspiration for this post. There are so many great books about how to serve God and do everything. Again, though, we're still just 8 year olds trying to clean a cabin.

I get it. You have to let God help you! That's how you succeed at the Christian life! So we work just as hard as we were working before and.... we still fail at cabin inspection.

Here's my point. Just like the cabin didn't pass until I cleaned it, our service for God won't pass until He does it. All of it. I know its not a perfect illustration, especially because God does use us to complete His perfect work, but He always uses us in such a way that, if we really looked at it, we'd realize that none of that was from our own work.

And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. - 2 Corinthians 12:9

Live dependant on God's grace and allow Him to work wonders.

Because of Him, 
Missa

Give it to Me

I was talking with God last night.

This past week, during chapel, I heard two illustrations about storms. In one story, the disciples' weak faith caused them to cry out and demand that Jesus Christ stop the storm. In the next story, the disciples were alone in the boat and Christ walked on the storm. This time, Peter asked for the ability to walk on the storm as well - and he did! Until he looked at what was making up the storm and he began to flounder. At this point, instead of calming the sea and letting the fisherman swim his way to the top, Christ reached out His hand and pulled Peter to the top of the waves. And they walked on the storm together.

Last night in prayer group, we were discussing what we had learned about God over the past week; either in our devotions or in chapel or perhaps through a song that had been stuck in our heads. I love the girls in my group so much. So many times, four or five of us have been learning the lesson, but different facets of it. While I was learning about waiting on God to calm storms and to dependently walk on storms, another girl was learning that our weaknesses are what causes us to turn to God. In other words, if we didn't have weaknesses, we would not be constantly calling on Him to help us.

My weaknesses make me completely and utterly unable to handle my storms. I've been trying to swim on my own, but that doesn't work. Then I turn to God (notice my order of operation) and demand that He stop the storm. I go back and forth between clinging to the stability of a frail, bobbing boat and throwing myself into a choppy sea trying to battle it out myself and drowning.

Sometimes when I look at my life, it feels like my trials define me. The pain of relationships broken or breaking, the stress of an insanely busy work/school schedule and an immense school bill, and the intense, internal struggle with sin that no one who looks at me could ever guess.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace

I have a tendency when I'm talking with people to discuss only the happy things (like a good grade on a test or a funny thing a teacher said) or the acceptable complaints (like an unfair teacher or an EVIL test). To a degree, that is perfectly fine - not everyone I come in contact with needs to know my problems. There is no need to place that burden on people.

The problem comes when I am unwilling to give that burden to God.

Oh, I can pray about my burdens - like how much I want those relationships fixed, or asking for strength so that I can make it through the day. This is NOT wrong! But, at the same time, I don't want to make God help me carry these burdens - or even to let Him take them from me and actually carry them for me. As His child, I wanted to bring Him things that bring Him joy, like a crayon colored picture. But while these things bring joy and He likes them, He, as my Father, wants to help me when I'm sick or in pain.

Last night, I was talking with God, my Gentle, Loving Father, and all I wanted to do was to be able to give Him something that would give Him joy, but all I could find was nasty, broken pain.

Give it to Me.

Wait, what?!

Cast your cares on Me, because I care for you.

But I want to give you something good - to be a profitable and contributing member of this family. 

Do you think that you can carry My burden for you while being tied under your own? 

But I don't want You to have to carry something for me when I can't give anything to You! That's not fair!

What part of "God of the Universe Who gives strength because He is strength" don't you understand? Your burden is heavy and you are weary. I will give you rest, but only if you give it to Me. Then, I can give you My burden, which is easy and light. 

Ok, so if I give You my burden, will the problems go away? 

In time and in different degrees. 

Then what's the point? I want it to be fixed now! I think I can do it myself if I can just work harder!

I want you to look at Me, and not the burden, not the storm, not yourself. I want you to hold My hand as I walk with you on top of the storm. 

I'm afraid - what if I start to drown again? What if I start to carry my burden again? 

Then just give it back to Me. In fact, just start making a habit of giving it back to Me every morning and every evening. Look at Me, and I will keep you safe. 

No, I didn't actually hear God speaking to me, but last night this was going on in my heart. Have you ever had a really good conversation with your best friend that lasted for hours and you just felt so relieved afterwards? I know that what I'm struggling with may or may not ever go away, but I also know Who is strong enough to carry me. Not take up the slack, but completely and totally carry. He is the God who walks on storms.

Because of Him,
Missa

Peer Dependent

Peer dependent. Those two words were the strongest insult of my high school life. No matter what happened, being peer dependent was never something to become.

This phrase is particularly popular among homeschooling families who lean towards a strong family structure. Please don't misunderstand, I am completely for following the Biblical model in regards to families (well in regards to everything, really). I would argue, however, that we are designed by God to be peer, as well as family, dependent.

What is peer dependency? To sum it up, basically it is a strong need for affirmation of one's self from one's peers (those of the same demographic, age, social situation, etc.). Some can take it to the point of an addiction, and often spend their waking hours trying to decide how to best improve one's Facebook persona or other such actions. The solution to such an addiction has been to practice a form of isolation. Or highly controlled exposure. This is when families keep to themselves and when they venture into the world, their friends are those who share identical beliefs. Thus, the children grow up to become exactly what their parents envision them to be.

Question: what happens when these children emerge into the world and are questioned for their beliefs? Most will answer with a response that lacks a Biblical basis and smacks of cultism. I'm not saying this to step on people's toes or be mean. I've been there and I've seen how others respond to me when I reply that way. And then there's the dreaded "friends" question. Do you have any friends? Well certainly! All of us homeschoolers are highly socialized (because we have to disprove that myth) and can list 100 people off the top of our head.

My next question is, is there anyone of those friends who have the knowledge of you or the relationship necessary to confront sin or encourage you to grow spiritually? The level of friendship required for that goes far beyond discussing knitting techniques or even what last Sunday's sermon was about.

If we go back to the original creation account, Eve was created for Adam because "it is not good that the man should be alone" (Genesis 2:18). The rest of the verse proceeds to complete the argument for traditional marriage, but that's not the point. The point is Adam needed another person. Yes, God is all sufficient for everything we need, but He can fulfill those needs through someone else. Part of the argument against peer relationships is because we shouldn't need anyone else besides our immediate family, but that's not true.

Proverbs 27 gives a wealth of information about friends and how to be a friend and what to look for in a friend.... And it's not talking about family. Friends should be willing to rebuke you. Their wounds are faithful, but they also build you up and sharpen you. This passage even rebukes those obnoxious morning people friends!

Ok, people need people, and part of this includes friends who are not family... what's the problem?

Well, the idea of dependency conveys a concept of need. So, if we need friends... does that make us peer dependent?

Like all good things, wisdom is necessary. I fully acknowledge that those of my peer level, early twenty something college students, are not always the most wise. But I also know how far to trust their counsel. I know when they are faithfully wounding me and sharpening me, trying to help me grow. I know that likely there are some decisions and problems that will arise that they will not have the ability to help with. But I also know that they are praying for me, and that intercession is so precious to me.

So, is peer dependency a failure? Or is it the admission of a common weakness wherein God has provided for us?

Bitter Season

Maybe you've noticed something about this blog... I love to take the illustrations from the Bible and see how they actually apply in daily life.

I've been thinking about fruit again. Probably because we really don't get much real fruit in the dining common here at the big Bob, or maybe because I'm really hungry... who wants to study accounting when you can eat?!

Think of a peach. Sweet, succulent, so juicy you don't even really have to bite into it to enjoy its flavor because it can't even contain itself. That peach from the summer that is just AMAZING!

Did you know that it did not always exist in that form? Well duh! A peach has to grow and go through many changes to become the fruit that it is.

What are those changes?

So much has to happen in order to get from a flower bud to get it to a point where it actually resembles fruit.

But I want to point one more thing out. If you eat the fruit when it first appears in a fruit-like state, you will be sadly disappointed.

Every piece of fruit must go through a season of bitterness in order to mature to perfect sweetness.

I'm going to ask you to not think of the definition of bitterness that I normally use on this blog, that of deep anger that festers in your soul and consumes you. But rather think of bitterness as something that is not pleasant in our general vernacular.

Throughout the Bible, we see the theme that suffering is part of our life. Think about Job. He was put through a trial that was beyond what what I can imagine, yet this was part of a divine plan by God. Through the trial, Job's faith was tried and refined. In James 1, we read that we ought to count it all joy when we have these trials and temptations because they are working patience in our life. Our trials bring us from fruit that, while it is there, is yet immature. It is necessary for fruit to mature, not just because we like to eat sweet, ripe fruit, but because of how God designed the tree to reproduce. If the unripe peach were to fall to the ground, it would not be able to grow the seed pit inside of it. That is just how it works. So too, we cannot expect to reproduce our fruit until it reaches some point of maturity.

One other thing I would like to point out. This process of growth through a season of bitterness happens yearly for peach trees. A few weeks ago, I would love to have thought that I had arrived spiritually. I thought all of my fruit was perfect and I didn't need to grow anymore. The reality is, just like a tree, we don't stop growing. At some point, we drop our fruit and start all over.

Here's hope, though. From what I have heard from farmers, every year, the fruit is better then the year before. This is because not only does the fruit go through a process of maturing, but also the tree itself. As we grow spiritually, we don't really have moments when we drop all the back to where we were before we were saved, but we have moments when we have to grow.

And sometimes, that means going through a bitter season.

Because of Him,
Missa

Expensive, But Totally Worth It

What is the most expensive thing you can think of? A Lamborghini? Jewels? Houses?

What makes something expensive? Is is merely the intrinsic worth of an item, or does sentimental value play into it?

If somebody were to try and buy either of the following two items, which would be more expensive?

A Ferrari or

Christmas morning

Wait, you can't buy Christmas. It's a day.

Ok, play along with me. If someone could buy and sell a day, would you give it up for a million dollars? Maybe if it were just any day... but what about Christmas day? Hot chocolate or coffee, a crackling fire, a five year old understanding how much fun it is to give mommy a gift, singing Christmas carols while preparing dinner, peace, quiet, time with those you love and who love you....

So, there you have it. Most people who have that wouldn't sell that morning for the world. Those who don't have that would give the world to get it.

But there is something else that costs so much.... and yet it is totally worth it.

Forgiveness

I was studying for one of my Bible classes this past weekend and there was a chapter in the textbook on forgiveness. I thought I knew it all. But I didn't. One thing I had never heard was this: forgiveness always has a cost. A very high cost in some cases.

Think about being forgiven for your sins. The only thing that can pay for sins is death. Christ gave up His life to make that payment for you. But think about when you ask God to forgive you for your sins. Does He ask you to pay for them?

No. They've been paid for. He absorbed the cost Himself. Through giving up His Son to death because of our sin, the penalty was paid, but He doesn't demand restitution for the loss He suffered. He gives forgiveness to all who ask.

Notice I don't say say to everyone. Only those who ask. We have to ask for forgiveness for it to be given. True, the offended party can overlook the wrong and not develop bitterness or anger over it, but that is not forgiveness. Someone has to pay the price for the wrong (not the ultimate price, but the immediate inter-relational price).

If someone dents your car, is it forgiveness to ask them to pay to fix the dent?

No. That is justice. That is right. That is perfectly acceptable. But it is not forgiveness.

Forgiveness is paying to fix the dent yourself.

Why would anyone want to do that??? Well, because maybe the other person can never possibly be able to make restitution for the damage.

And what happens if no one ever pays to fix the damage? Well...

It stays.

Expensive? Yeah...

Worth it?

Well, you tell me.

Because of Him,
Missa

Empty

Three things I have learned from going to college full time:

• You can either get an "A" in English or in your favorite class - not both (choose wisely)
• They give away twice as many room job demerits on Friday because nobody works the desk after classes
• You will get very sleepy - really! By the second week of school, you are falling asleep in classes

Why? Because the plain and simple fact of life is natural selection - only the strongest can survive the full credit load, work, and social time involved in college. Oh, and there's eating too... forgot about that one.

So I'm kinda joking a bit, but sometimes that is how it seems. And talking to those who are older than me, it sounds like it doesn't actually get better the older you get - you just don't have as much energy to do more things.

Have you ever thought about the fact that God doesn't get tired? Well,duh! Who else would be listening to our prayers at 2 am when we're working on our paper and the computer dies?

No, seriously. Our God is never weary, never weighed down by the cares of life, never sleeps, never faints, never even takes His eyes off of us to blink. He is vigilant, faithful, and cares for us more than we do.

On Monday, in chapel, the preacher was reading Isaiah 40. He was really only reading the first part to emphasize the perfect and enduring nature of God's word and the necessity for Bible translation. That afternoon, I was studying for a science test and came across a note I had made about a verse later on in the passage. Then, that evening I was getting ready to go running and was a bit antsy, so I pulled out my Bible again to read the same passage (once I get stuck on something, I have a hard time getting off of it until I have it completely processed in my mind).

The whole passage is speaking about the marvelousness of God and asks twice "Have you not known? Have you not heard?" concerning certain attributes of God. But I want to show one thing to you:

Hast thou not known? hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary? there is no searching of his understanding.

He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.

Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall:

But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:28-31 

Our God is not weary and doesn't faint. That is something that everyone should know and accept. But God is the One that gives us our strength. We are weary. We faint. God renews that which we have lost so that we can run without weariness and walk without fainting.

Another thing I've learned, somewhat recently but this is also just a review lesson for me, is that there are different kinds of weariness. Sometimes it is physical weariness. Without the proper amount of sleep and nutrition, your body wears down faster and faster until you can barely stay awake in chapel at 11, much less pay attention in your 4 pm class. 

The second type of weariness is emotional or mental. You can reach a point where you're technically getting enough sleep, but because of just life in general, you are weary. And it's not necessarily something bad that happened, but just something that took up a lot of emotion in your day. For me, when I write, especially on this blog, I'm basically putting my devotional journal on here - that just takes a lot out of me. Sometimes it's comforting a friend who is hurting, sometimes it is a moment of complete joy and happiness. Somethings are just emotionally draining.

And then we have Christ. We love as He loved. We give ourselves to others for His glory. And there is always enough grace to make it through one more day. 

I can tell you that there have been times this semester that I have gotten up before 5 and didn't fall asleep until after 2. I was completely worn out and was struggling to get the minimum amount of work done (lets not even talk about the "extras" of studying). But daily I found that He gave me energy to make it through. He gave it by different ways - a friend to talk to, an encouraging verse, a kind word at work.... But it was Him. He daily filled my life with His strength and then kept topping me off until I reached the end of the day - completely empty, but looking forward to the next day to glorify Him in His strength.

Because of Him,

Missa

Suntanned

During prayer group this week, we were reading a prayer letter from a missionary in Antigua who told the story of a man who did not want to get saved until he had had his fun. This unsaved man know that to be a Christian meant a radically different life from that of the world. That is what being a Christian is.

If you look at American Christianity throughout history, there has been a dramatic progression from having a noticeably different lifestyle to just blending into a crowd. This is due, not to a lack of true regeneration, but to a blurring of the line of what is good and what is bad. There is now what is called "a gray area" of "not that bad". Why is "not that bad" acceptable? What is the "that" that we are comparing our actions/words/entertainment choices on? 

When you are first exposed to the sun at the beginning of the summer what happens? Initially, you will get burned. It hurts and you notice it and shy away from it. But sunburns don't last forever. For three months, though, you are being exposed more and more to the burning rays, and yet you don't get burned. You get more and more tan. Eventually, it can get to the point that you don't even see that you are tanned and spending hours outside no longer causes the pain it once did. It's only when you return from your vacation and come in contact with those who worked desk jobs all summer and are still pasty white that you see how far it has gone.

So think of sin in the same way. The first time you heard a curse word or profanity in a movie (and actually knew what it meant) were you surprised? Did it cause a bit of pain? But you were watching the movie with your family or close friend... and they thought it was fine... Or at least they didn't say anything about it.

Fast forward five years. Now you regularly watch movies with "questionable" (sinful) content. But it's only rated PG13! Or maybe even PG... But there is so much worse out there right now. This movie really isn't that bad. 

I heard a sermon at camp about David. He was a man after God's own heart, but how was he so? In 1 Samuel 24, twice David sinned. Both times they were things that aren't that bad, and yet it says that his heart smote him. He felt the pain of sin. Instead of excusing it since it wasn't that bad, he repented and did not repeat the sin. In Psalm 101 we find his plan to stay away from sin:

Psalm 101 I will sing of mercy and judgment: unto thee, O LORD, will I sing. 

I will behave myself wisely in a perfect way. O when wilt thou come unto me? I will walk within my house with a perfect heart. 

I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me. 

A froward heart shall depart from me: I will not know a wicked person. 

Whoso privily slandereth his neighbour, him will I cut off: him that hath an high look and a proud heart will not I suffer. 

Mine eyes shall be upon the faithful of the land, that they may dwell with me: he that walketh in a perfect way, he shall serve me. 

He that worketh deceit shall not dwell within my house: he that telleth lies shall not tarry in my sight. 

I will early destroy all the wicked of the land; that I may cut off all wicked doers from the city of the LORD. 

Because of Him,

Missa

Enduring

*The following story is told in first person for dramatic effect ONLY. Any resemblance to people or events living or dead is purely coincidental*

I am very close to someone. I care about them more than anything and do what I can to serve them in sacrificial love. Not necessarily a spouse, but certainly a very close and dear friend. I confide in this person and they confide in me. 

And then, one day, I learn that the trust we shared has been broken. This person has been taking my  information and using it behind my back to mock me or to damage my reputation. 

What am I going to do about it?! This is totally uncalled for, I have done everything for this person! I've served them and they turn around and stick a knife in my back! This is not fair! I shouldn't have to put up with this!

*Deep Breath* Well, maybe this was a one time sin.... Yeah, that's it. I can forgive and forget! Life returns to its placid state. 

And it happens again! 

Let us say, for the sake of shortening our words, that this cycle happens many times over several years until....

I just don't care anymore. I don't want to love that person anymore. 

All right, story time is over. I think, in all honesty, this has happened to a lot of us. We've been betrayed by someone we love. How are you supposed to respond to this? Even when the offense has only happened once, not multiple times, how are we supposed to respond? To be completely honest, I am dealing with something like this right now, as well as watching a conflict like this develop and simmer for several months (years, really). How are we all to respond as Christians? 

Someone whom I greatly trust gave this advice: apply 1 Corinthians 13. Isn't it great when God gives us very specific instructions on how to act?

Yeah, well I want to see anyone who can completely apply that passage! "Believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things"... Love is really hard!  Love is not "when I feel like it" or "when they are always acting in a loving manner towards me" Did you know that we are supposed to even supposed to treat people this way when they are our enemies?! (Matthew 5:43-44) 

So, the Bible really is pretty intense on this issue of what true love is. Let's just look at 1 Corinthians 13 in parts:

Charity (Love)...

• Suffereth Long - that means to suffer for a long time (i. e. you don't have a "last straw")
• Is Kind - We went over this in Sunday School today. Kindness is doing something for someone because you care about, whether you want to do it or not
• Envieth Not - You are not jealous of what the other person has that you don't (be it possessions, popularity, or personality)
• Vaunteth Not Itself - Basically it means that your goal is not to be lifted up or promoted by the object of your love. Your goal is actually to lift the other person up.
• Is Not Puffed Up - Don't be proud in a self-glorifying manner. (See the whole book of proverbs)
• Doth Not Behave Itself Unseemly - It knows where the boundaries are and stays well within them
• Seeketh Not Her Own - Look out for the other person, let God worry about Who is taking care of you
• Is Not Easily Provoked - Don't let your buttons get pushed (see "suffereth long")
• Thinketh No Evil - This is a hard one: don't assume that the person who is doing you wrong is actually being malicious. This is a really hard one. Personally, I love to talk issues out - to think out loud. Sometimes I want to have someone with a listening ear. That may be all that the issue is about. True, the other person may be lacking discernment as to who they are confiding in, but we are talking about your response, not their actions.
• Rejoiceth Not In Iniquity, But Rejoiceth In Truth - Don't silently gloat when the other person is falling on their face in sin! Just because you have an issue with them does not mean that the more they stumble the better because that might mean that they will finally get right with God - and you. Anyone who has struggled with sin can tell you that one sin leads to another which leads to another... and the more sin the harder it is to get it all right and taken care of. We should rejoice when we see them doing the right thing! That shows a tenderness towards God and perhaps a leading to restitution
• Beareth All Things - Carry the other person's burdens
• Believeth All Things - When they tell you that they are sorry... believe them
• Hopeth All Things - An old saying is "while there is life, there is hope". It is ok to hope for a restoration!
• Endureth All Things - No matter what happens... you will always still love this person. Period. 

So, what are you going to do with this? Maybe, you aren't necessarily in the wrong. But when you do not respond in love, you are, in fact, sinning. Love is a command, not an option. So....Maybe you need to make things right. Maybe you need to admit to other person that you have sinned by not loving them in a Biblical manner. 

Please do not merely change your actions without making a verbal acknowledgment of your wrong! This is very important. When you do not admit your wrong, the other person will not see their need to admit their wrong. You are also dancing on the edge of pride, since you do not see the need to "go to thy brother" (Matthew 5:24) and humble yourself. 

Please do not leave this website without reading two other posts of mine, if you have not already done so: Mirror Image and Soul Piercing. Please note, I am not writing to someone else, I am writing this to YOU.

Because of Him,

Missa

Offending Gospel

Maybe this isn't a post for my regular readers... but it might be. Or maybe this post will just be one to refer to in future discussions. Definitely more practical than philosophical.

Manners matter.

Well, yeah, that's what my mom always said!

But have you ever really thought about what manners are and what their purpose is? Manners are actions or words used to make everyone around you as comfortable and non-distracted as possible. But does this really make a difference to a Christian?

Yup.

When you are having a conversation with someone, do you notice them doing things you were taught weren't polite? For example, as kids, we were not allowed to have our elbows on the table. Now, when I'm eating with someone, if they put their elbows on the table, it distracts me, even if only momentarily. The same goes for chewing gum in church, using language that is crude (not necessarily swearing, just unpleasant words), and cracking knuckles.

The point is, Satan will use whatever he has to to distract people from the Gospel, even bad manners. When someone displays poor manners, they are saying, even unintentionally, that they are the most important person in the room and they don't care what you think.

I've been told that having an attitude of not caring what people think is a good thing, and it probably is. Nevertheless, we must be aware that some actions completely repulse people. Without them, you are not that much at a loss, but your friends may be greatly benefited by them. You will never offend people by your lack of crudity, but rather attract people by your abundance of consideration.

Let me give another example in a slightly different direction. Recently, I was discussing an issue with a friend of mine concerning a recent news story about a boy not being allowed to wear a shirt with a confederate flag to school. While I agreed with the young man about it being an encroachment on our American liberty, I disagree that we should actually protest it, or intentionally wear that symbol (or any other one, for that matter) to make a statement. A common saying in this time is to "wear your heart on your sleeve". Let everyone know all of your opinions and vehemently defend them at all times.

But who are we proclaiming to the World? Ourselves? ... or Christ?  In 2 Corinthians 4:5, Paul gives himself as a model for how we should act. We're preaching Christ and Him crucified. Verse 11 talks about living Christ in the flesh. We are living like Christians (little Christs) at the expense of who we are.

Now before you decry my statements as too harsh and impossible... consider this; when you purchase a Mac, you are communicating, in a way, that you want to be associated with that brand. You wear a Superman shirt because he's cool. You are continually preaching something - why must it be something of this World and not of Christ? Live your faith - in what you say, do, and display to those around you (1 Timothy 4:12)

Because of Him,
Missa

Dazed

Green Thunder was robbed. If you don't attend Bob Jones, you likely will not understand, but please just acknowledge that fact as true. Just like the Cardinals were robbed in their Super Bowl attempt a few years ago by a terrible call, so was the Green Thunder team of the 2013 edition of Gold Rush Daze here at the big Bob.

What am I really talking about? When I arrived on campus in January, I was already hearing things about an event coming up in March. A huge campus-wide competition that only occurs once every four years. Of all the semesters I could chose to begin my studies, I had chosen the most epic.

For two and a half months, the anticipation grew with every midnight pep rally and Facebook meme. Then the day came that the students were allowed to decorate the entire campus, and it looked like Christmas had come back to raise it's ugly head (it really did look ugly).

But, unfortunately, events began to take place that tore through the veil of friendly competition. Decorations that had taken hours to make were destroyed. Pranks were played. Some really weren't that bad, but some were pretty destructive.

And the fun stopped.

The competition continued, but the few who had gone too far made the rest of us just wish for March 12th to be over.

One day. That's all. All the planning. All the money. All the late hours decorating. All for one day. All for the "rush" of Gold Rush Daze. I enjoyed the event as much as everyone, but at the end of the day, it really just felt empty. I was hoarse, sunburned, and very tired. I never wanted to see the colors green or red again.

A whole college campus consumed with the temporary.

But, don't we all struggle in that way? Some people call it the rat race, the business of life, or just life. We are consumed with the here and now.

And I don't just mean today.

In the big picture, we have eternity to look forward to as Christians. James 4:14 shows, in a way, how God views our life: a vapor.

A vapor. A tiny puff of water that disappears as soon as it has appeared. That's all that our life is. It's nothing!

And yet it is still something. We are given the number of our days, and no more, to be used to serve God for His glory. While we are here on this earth, ours eyes should be looking for "that blessed hope" and "glorious appearing of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ" (Titus 2:13). The world wants us to see life in the view that today is all that matters; get as much of a "rush" as you can from it. Someone once said (I forget who) that for Christians, this world is as close to Hell as we can get... and for the unsaved, it is as close to heaven as they can get. If that is true, then it is no wonder the unsaved are consumed with this world and the pleasures thereof. But why do Christians become enraptured with it... even within the goal of service?

I've noticed a pattern within my own life. When my focus is on Christ and glorifying Him and looking towards His kingdom, my joy and eagerness to serve Christ knows no bounds. I cannot get enough of His Word or spending time with His people. But when my life is consumed with the here and now, I know that I am only serving for self-glorification...and oddly enough, I'm ok with that, though I have lost the true joy that comes from service.

I'm ok with that?! Yeah, well as a selfish person living in a selfish world, its easy to forget my first and only true love and look back and enjoy what I see, then to continue in life walking backwards. But walking backwards is only easy for a short time. It becomes difficult... confusing. A path that was normal and easy a month ago is now a struggle to surmount. I cannot see all of the pitfalls of sin, and thus fall into them much more easily. I begin a downward spiral, obvious only to me and those who know me the best. Still I persist until, at last, I am driven to my knees begging for forgiveness. I thought that I was standing, but I fell. (1 Corinthians 10:12)

Keep your heart and mind turned to God, and do not allow the world to daze you with its charms and entice you away from Him and the true purpose of life - glorifying Him. Make your vapor count. (Thank you Ironwood)

Because of Him,
Missa